A fart can be quiet, a fart can be loud,
Some leave a powerful poisonous cloud
A fart can be short, or a fart can be long,
Some farts have been known to sound like a song.....
A fart can create a most curious medley,
A fart can be harmless, or silent and deadly.
A fart might not smell, while others are vile,
A fart may pass quickly, or linger a while......
A fart can occur in a number of places,
and leave everyone there, with strange looks on their faces.
From wide-open prairie, to small elevators,
A fart will find all of us sooner or later.
But farts are all bad is simply not true -
We must not forget... sweet old farts like you!
Some people come here to sit and
and some come here so shit and stink
I just came to scratch my balls
and read the poems on the walls
Here I lie in stinky vapor,
Because some bastard stole the toilet paper,
Shall I lie, or shall I linger,
Or shall I be forced to use my finger.
Here I sit
What a caper
I have to shit
But I'm out of paper
You had your chance
I tried to fart,
And shit in my pants!
Here I sit,
I'm at a loss trying to shit out taco sauce.
When it comes, I hope and pray,
I don't blow my ass away
Here I sit,
Hoped to shit
but only farted...