Well, it's shit ... that's right, shit!

Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language.
 
Consider:
You can get shit-faced, Be shit-out-of-luck, Or have shit for brains.
With a little effort, you can get your shit together, find a place for your shit, or be asked to shit or get off the pot.
 
You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose shit, find shit, forget shit, and tell others to eat shit.

Some people know their shit, while others can't tell the difference between shit and shineola.

There are lucky shits, dumb shits, and crazy shits. There is bull shit, horse shit, and chicken shit. You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit, shoot the shit, or duck when the shit hits the fan. You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle.
You can find yourself in deep shit or be happier than a pig in shit. Some days are colder than shit, some days are hotter than shit, and some days are just plain shitty.Some music sounds like shit, things can look like shit, and there are times when you feel like shit.
You can have too much shit, not enough shit, the right shit, the wrong shit or a lot of weird shit. You can carry shit, have a mountain of shit, or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle.
Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and other times you fall in a bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose.
 
When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the basic building block of the English language. And remember, once you know your shit, you don't need to know anything else!!
You could pass this along, if you give a shit; or not do so if you don't give a shit!
Well, Shit, it's time for me to go. I just wanted you to know that I do give a shit and hope you had a nice day, without a bunch of shit. But, if you happened to catch a load of shit from some shit-head...........

Well, Shit Happens!!

I am sorry for that shit - You have been here for a shit long time.
 

 

Fuck is #2 of the most functional word in the English language.
 
 
A Catholic priest and a nun were taking a rare afternoon off and
enjoying a round of golf. The priest stepped up to the first tee and took a
mighty swing. He missed the ball entirely and said "Shit, I missed."
The good Sister told him to watch his language.
 
On his next swing, he missed again. "Shit, I missed."
"Father, I'm not going to play with you if you keep swearing," the nun said tartly. The priest promised to do better and the round continued. On the
4th tee, he misses again. The usual comment followed. Sister is really mad now and says, "Father John, God is going to strike you dead if you keep swearing like that."

On the next tee, Father John swings and misses again. "Shit, I missed."
A terrible rumble is heard and a gigantic bolt of lightning comes out
of the sky and strikes Sister Marie dead in her tracks.
 
"SHIIIIIT ........I MISSED!."

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