8 months pregnant

A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man
opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another
seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again.
The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, she had the man
arrested. The case came up in court. The judge asked the man (about
20 years old) what he had to say for himself. The man replied, "Well
your Honor, it was like this: When the lady got on the bus, I
couldn't help but notice her condition. She sat under a sweets sign
that said, "The Double Mint Twins are Coming" and I grinned. Then
she moved and sat under a sign that said, "Logan's Liniment will
reduce the swelling, and I had to smile. Then she placed herself
under a deodorant sign that said, "William's Big Stick Did the
Trick," and I could hardly contain myself.

BUT, your Honor, when she moved the fourth time and sat under a sign
that said "Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this accident"... I
just lost it." CASE DISMISSED!

 

 

Italian Grandma's Advice!
A young Italian girl was going on a date.
Her Nonna said: 'Sit-a here ana leta me tella you about this-a younga boy.
He's agonna try ana kiss you, you are agonna likea dat, but don't let him do dat.
He's agonna try ana kiss your breasts, you are agonna likea dat too, but don'ta let him do dat eeda.
But mosta important, he's agonna try ana lay on topa you, you are agonna really likea dat, but don'ta let him do dat for sure.
Doing thata willa disgraza our family.
With that bit of advice, the granddaughter went on her date. The next day she told grandma that her date went just like she had predicted:
'And Nonna, I didn't let him disgrace our family as you said.
When he tried to lay on top of me, I just rolled him over, got on top of him, and disgraced HIS family!'
Nonna fainted!!

 

         

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